-Got the number? -Ready.
Nice and tight. Two... three... four...
COOL CHANGE: On The Streets Of The Bronx
'This is the fallen area of the Bronx.'
'My home.'
'A world unto itself.'
'We're 15 minutes away from any bar,
but they might as well be three thousand miles away.'
'The sound of Mount Carmel church bells would fill the neighbourhood.'
# On the streets of the Bronx
# Is where I wanna be
'It was 1960 and doo-wop was the sound on the streets.'
# Standing on the corner
'It felt like there was a doo-wop group on every corner back then.'
'What a time it was.'
'The Yankees were playing The Pirates in the world series,
and Mickey Mantle was like a god to me.'
'My dad would take me to watch the Yankees win at Yankee Stadium.'
'That's the Chez Bippy.'
'That's where all the guys hung out, but I'll tell you about them later.'
'That's my building. I live on the third floor.'
'667 East 187th Street.'
'There's my stoop.'
'And on summer nights, in the neighbourhood,
you'd hear the young Italian men romancing their women.'
Hey, Marie!
-Get in the fucking car! -No!
Get in the car!
Leave me alone.
-Come on, you know I love you. -Bullshit!
Will you get in the fucking car!
'And right there - right under that lamppost,
stood the number one man in the neighbourhood.'
' Sonny.'
'Everyone loved Sonny, and they treated him like a god.'
'And in my neighbourhood he was a god.'
'I would sit on my stoop and watch him all day and all night.'
'But he would never look at me.'
'Never.'
'Until one day.'
DION AND THE BELMONTS: I Wonder Why
-Hey. -What do want?
You got room for us?
You wish.
# Don't know why I love you
# Don't know why I care
# I just want your love to share
# I wonder why I love you like I do
# Is it because I think you love me too?
# I wonder why I love you like I do
# Like I do
# Wap!
# Wap! Wap!
# Wap! Wap! Wap!
# I told my friends that we would never part
# They often said that you would break my heart
# I wonder why they think that we would part
# We would part
# Wap!
# Wap! Wap!
# Wap! Wap! Wap!
THE CLEFTONES -Little Girl Of Mine
# Oh, little girl of mine
# Gee, you sure look fine
# Yes, you appeal to me... #
-Hey! Hey! -Oh, Shit! Let's go!
'That's my dad, Lorenzo Anello.'
'His bus route was 1 87th Street and I loved to ride the bus with him.'
'That's me, Calogero, nine years old.'
-See ya later, Pop. -OK.
-Go right upstairs, son. -OK, Pop.
'That's my mum, Rosina.'
'She met my dad at a dance.'
'They've been in love ever since.'
Take care of the fucking game.
FRANK SINATRA: Same Old Song And Dance
'The Chez Bippy. Where the guys hung out.'
'Tony Toupee owned the bar in name only.'
'It was really Sonny's place.'
'Tony was a singer and everybody hated his voice.'
'So for spite he never spoke a word, he always sung it.'
'They called him Tony Toupee cos he wore the worst hairpiece in the world.'
'Eddie Mush was a gambler.'
'He was also the biggest loser ever.'
'Everything he touched turned to mush.'
I need a winner.
'He would go to the races
and the teller would give him his tickets already ripped up.'
I had the Yankees, they've lost.
If it wasn't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all.
'Georgio the Whale.'
'As they say, you didn't walk with Georgio,
you walked among him.'
'You could see him get fatter by the hour.'
'Legend has it, his shadow once killed a dog.'
'Frankie Coffeecake,
so called cos his face looked like a coffee cake.'
'He was tough to look at.'
OK, kid, how're you doing?
'His name was Jimmy Whispers, and he was Sonny's main man.'
'Everything was a secret to him.'
David KO knocked guys out,
and Bobby Bars spent half his life behind them.
This was Sonny's crew, and nobody fucked with them.
What are you doing here?
Didn't we tell you not to come here? Didn't I tell you to come upstairs?
Wait till I tell your father. What were you doing there?
I was looking for daddy.
Looking for daddy? That's very nice.
I have to go to the store. Don't move. Wait here.
You hear me?
Whenever I saw Sonny I imitated him,
but still he would never look at me.
Sonny had five fingers, but he only used three.
Come on, let's go. Move. Upstairs.
I'm not in the mood for steak.
Oh, you're not in the mood for steak, huh?
You know how many times I have to drive that bus so we can eat steak?
-Seven. -Who told you that?
Nobody. I counted.
Your father wants to talk to you.
About what, Dad?
You were by the bar today.
I wasn't by the bar.
-Tell the truth. -I was by the bar.
-Why d'you lie? -I took a shot.
-Do something. -Like what? He took a shot.
-Nice try, son. -Thanks, Dad.
Lorenzo, come on, please.
How do I stop him? The bar's two doors away.
Daddy's right, listen to him.
-You should shut up. -Gimme your plate.
I want you to listen to me. Hey!
Do not go near the bar.
Stay by the stoop, not the bar.
-One day you'll understand. -Yes.
You don't see me there.
-You're not allowed there either? -What do I do?
Hey, I don't know.
I'm kidding. I won't go to the bar.
Look, two tickets, Yankee Stadium, centre field.
-Behind The Mick? -Yes. Now eat your steak.
Yeah!
Let's go, Alfie.
'That's Phil the Peddler.'
'He'd call everybody Mary,
and me and my friends would love to break his balls.'
'Slick and Crazy Mario were my best friends.'
'Slick got his name cos of his hair. Mario got his cos he was just crazy.'
Yeah-a-oh!
I'll kick your fucking asses, you bunch of Marys!
Stay away from the fruit!
Get your hands off the fruit!
-You fucking kids! -Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
I'll kick you loose, you Marys! All three of you!
Yeah - a - oh!
I'm gonna fucking ball-break you!
Keep your hands off. What do you think this is, a charity?
Go and make your parents feed you,
and give you to orphan homes.
Fucking ball-breakers!
How many d'you get?
Oh, boy, Coffeecake's in trouble.
He'll get his ass kicked.
Guys, check it out.
Mario, come here. Who's this?
Oh, that's Jimmy Whispers.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Wait a minute.
It's Sonny.
Jesus! You do somebody now, big mouth.
Do somebody hard, like Coffeecake.
I can't do Coffeecake.
That's hard.
Put a screen in front of your face while I throw shit at it.
Oh, shit.
These niggers got some balls coming here.
They just pass through from school.
How do you know?
My father told me.
Well, my father told me that's how it starts.
Get the fuck out of our neighbourhood!
Go back to where you came from!
Lucky you're on that bus.
-Come back here, nigger! -If I catch you...
Why?
Oh, shit!
You don't fucking stop.
Get the fuck out out of here!
Nobody's cooler than you, Sonny.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
What are you doing?
Fuck you, you asshole.
Fuck you, you scumbag!
I'll cut off your fucking legs!
I'll bust your head!
Let's get outta here.
Give me the gun.
-Get in the car! -Move it!
-Come on! -Come on!
'When Sonny looked at me for the first time I went deaf.'
'All I could see was Sonny with the gun in his hand.'
Dad!
Is he alright?
Dad, it was just a parking space.
Is he alright?
-Baby, are you OK? -He's alright.
-What happened? -I'm OK, Mom.
Oh, my God, I got so scared.
I'm OK, Mom.
Dad, they were fighting over a parking space.
-A parking space? -Daddy, why?
-They just met at the wrong time. -He could have got killed.
Let's mind our own business.
I can't believe it.
Who is it?
Police. Is this the Anello residence?
Yeah, can I help you?
Look, we'd like to ask you some questions.
About what?
Just open the door.
-How are you? -OK.
Good. I'm detective Belsik.
This is Detective Vella. Hello, son. Hello, ma'am.
We'd like to ask your son a few questions.
About what?
There was a shooting - we think he saw it.
Really?
He don't know nothing.
We feel he does. People saw him.
Well, they're wrong. He don't know nothing.
Listen, Mr Anello.
We can make this easy or hard, alright? We can go down to -
He don't know nothing.
Daddy, I know everything.
Kids, you know? They make believe.
We know your son was down there, so come on, let's go.
Son, here's what I'd like you to do.
Come downstairs, and your father, and look at some people.
All you have to do is pick out the man you saw with the gun, that's it.
Think you can do that?
Yeah.
Good. Let's take a walk.
Mr Anello, take a walk downstairs.
-We won't be long. -Go on.
Officer, will he be OK?
Everything will be fine, dear.
That's him.
Alright, fellas, turn around.
You two, take your hats off.
Hey! Put your head up.
Straight ahead. Look this way.
-Is that him? -No.
How about him?
Straight ahead, fella.
-How about him? -No.
Straight ahead, you.
How about him?
Give me an answer.
-How about him? -No.
How about him? Is it this guy?
Give me an answer.
-No. -OK.
Hey! Put your eyes up.
How about this guy?
-It's not him. No. -No? Let's go.
Hey! Look straight ahead.
Look at me. That's it.
Is it this guy?
-What about this guy? -No.
OK.
How about this guy?
Hey! Straight ahead!
How about this guy? Is it him?
Give me an answer.
-No. -Satisfied, Officer?
-No, I'm not. -He can't help -
Yeah, he doesn't know anything.
He said he can't help.
I tell you what, take a walk. Go ahead.
Come on, son, let's go.
You guys can go. Beat it.
-Get outta here. -Fucking rude.
We fooled them, Dad.
Yeah, we fooled them.
I didn't rat, Dad. I didn't rat.
No, you didn't rat.
I did a good thing, right?
Yeah, you did a good thing.
You did a good thing for a bad man.
'I did a good thing for a bad man.'
'I didn't understand that.'
'But I knew a rat was the lowest thing anyone could be in my neighbourhood.'
Hey!
Hey.
Why did you say I did a good thing for a bad man?
Cos sometimes you have to do things even though they're not right.
Do you understand what I'm saying?
It's just that, I thought I did the right thing,
and now I'm not sure that I did.
It was the right thing, one day you'll understand why.
We love you very, very much.
Tomorrow, ride with me on the bus.
'City Island was the last stop on my father's route.'
'It was one of our favourite places.'
'It was like going on a vacation.'
'My dad would listen to his jazz, and we would talk about baseball.'
Can I get an ice cream?
Job first, and then ice cream.
-OK? -OK, Pop.
There.
Let's play a game, Dad.
OK. Who was the last player to win the triple crown?
Mickey Mantle.
Batting average: 353.
RVIs: 130.
Home runs: 52.
Pretty good, son.
He's the best ball player that ever lived, Dad.
Joe Dee's the greatest ball player.
-Yankee clipper. 56 games in a streak. -That's right.
-Nobody beat that. Right, Dad? -Nobody beat that, son.
And why he was so great?
He was Italian?
Well, partly that.
Then why?
Because of his talent.
-Talent? -That's right.
Do I have talent, Dad?
You have all the talent in the world.
Can I be a baseball player?
You can be anything you want.
The saddest thing in life is wasted talent.
If you don't do the right thing with that talent, nothing happens.
But if you do right, good things happen.
-You hear me? -You're right.
Let's get that ice cream.
Yeah. Good.
I'm gonna shut the doors, right, Dad?
Yeah.
Ready? On two.
-Got it? -I got it.
'Wasted talent, that was something my father would talk about all of my life.'
We can hear the start of the game.
"36,683 here to see the final game of the 16th series."
"And what a game we're seeing."
"Moose Garret with that in-field hit,
needs a third to pick up his 1 2th world series best hitter in 1 960".
"And here's the first incoming to Thatcher."
-See ya later, Pop. -OK.
Go and watch the rest of the game.
Go right upstairs.
"Dougie Ferrer picked it up a little for the Yankees."
Hey, Lorenzo.
Keep driving. I wanna talk.
-Your kid. He's a good kid. -Thanks.
Sonny appreciates what you did.
I'm just glad everything worked out.
We want to thank you.
Just deliver some numbers and you'll get $150 a week.
No need to leave the bus.
Thanks, but I've got a job. If I get pinched, I'd lose it.
-Think about it. -I can't do it, it's not for me.
$150 and you won't think about it?
I can't do it, it's just not for me.
Sonny will be disappointed when I tell him.
OK.
Stop the bus here. I wanna get off.
-They offered me a job. -Doing what?
Numbers. I pick up a piece of paper and drop it off,
and I get $150 a week.
What did you say?
What do you think I said? It's not for me.
What?
I don't know. $150. It's only numbers.
-Should I have taken it? -I don't know.
But, get involved with those guys, next thing you know - one, two, three.
I don't know.
Maybe you're right.
I'm gonna check on the baby.
Come here.
-What? -Come here.
Are you sorry you got stuck with a bus driver?
-I fell in love with your uniform. -Yeah.
'The day of the funeral I felt really bad.'
'A man had died, and I had lied and committed a mortal sin.'
'I wanted God to forgive me.'
Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
It has been one month since my last confession.
I missed mass twice, I lied about witnessing a murder once,
I ate meat on Friday once.
Can you back up a bit and say that again?
I ate meat on Friday?
Not that one. Back up a little more.
I lied about witnessing a murder?
That's the one.
Do you realise what you said?
It was only once, Father.
Do you about the 5th?
Yes. I can refuse to answer on the grounds that I might incrimate.
The fifth commandment.
Thou shalt not kill.
That's right. Now, I want you to tell me what happened.
No, I'm not telling nobody nothing.
Don't be afraid. Nobody's more powerful than God.
I don't know about that.
Your guy is bigger up there,
but my guy's bigger down here.
You gotta point. Five Our fathers, and five Hail Marys.
For a murder rap? Not bad, Father.
-What did you say? -Bye, Father!
'It was great to go to confession.'
'I could start over every week.'
Hey, kid.
Sonny wants to see you. Nobody will move the bike.
Here's the kid, Sonny.
Go on, don't be afraid.
How you doing, kid?
Good.
We finally meet face to face.
Yeah.
You afraid of me?
-No. -That's good.
What's your name?
Calogero.
That's a big name. You got a nickname?
No.
What do your friends call you?
Calogero.
That makes sense.
What are you, a Yankee fan?
Yeah.
Sit down.
No, come over here. Sit over here, next to me.
You must be pretty upset that the Yankees lost.
Ben Lazeroski -I hate him.
He made Mickey Mantle cry. The papers said The Mick was crying.
You're upset about Mickey Mantle?
He makes $100,000 a year. What does your pa make?
-I don't know. -You don't know?
Go ask Mickey Mantle to pay your rent, see what he says.
He don't care about you so why should you care about him? Nobody cares.
Can I ask you something?
Sure.
Did you shoot that man over a parking space?
When you're older you'll understand.
Mm-hm.
'From that day on, I never felt the same about the Yankees again.'
MUSIC: DEAN MARTIN: Ain't That A Kick In The Head
# How lucky can one guy be?
# I kissed her and she kissed me
# Like the fella once said
# Ain't that a kick in the head? #
'I spent a lot of time with Sonny.'
'I would get home from school and sneak away any chance I got.'
'I'd serve the guys drinks and coffee, and they would give me tips.'
-Roll 'em. -Come on.
-Sonofabitch! -I don't fucking believe it!
Here kid, this is for you.
Sonny, loan me a hundred.
Come on, you know what'll happen.
Come on, I feel it.
Give him a $100.
-There's a fucking $100. Take it. -I'm in. I'm in.
It's fucking hot.
OK, Mush, get it over with.
-Come on, dice. -I'll bet $25.
Baby needs a new pair of shoes.
Come on. Seven.
Come on, alright. Come on, dice. I'll get a seven.
I don't need to look.
Damn! I'm out. I'm out.
Get out of here.
Get him outta here. Get him outta here.
He never had a number in his life.
In his life!
Give me the dice.
Where's the kid?
Put this coffee on my -
I'll put it on your tab, just fuck off.
-Where's the kid? -Kindergarten.
The kid's gonna throw the dice.
-Don't let him throw. -You got a problem with that?
That's alright, no problem.
Huh?
Come on, throw the dice.
I can't play dice, Sonny.
That's OK, you just listen to me, did you hear what I said?
-OK. -Just listen.
Alright, put $500 down on the kid.
-I've got $100. -$500!
I'll take a shot.
Hey! Can you stop fucking leaning on me?
You're breathing all over me!
-Hey, Georgio. -Relax.
I wanna play too, you know?
Hit the wall, kid. You can do it.
Hit the wall.
-Wait, wait, wait, wait. -You can do it.
I'm betting on Sonny.
Hey! I don't want your money touching my money!
-What? -I don't want your money -
My money's no good? Why?
Why? Cos you're a fucking jinx. Put him in the fucking bathroom.
Get outta here!
-Get outta here! -Fucking loser!
Motherfucker!
Leave him there.
He's a fucking jinx!
It's a lot of money.
-Shoot the fucking dice. -Hit the wall.
-Alright! -Yeah!
Bring the dice up.
Here.
I'll bet a $100.
You can do it.
Alright? You can do it.
Georgio, stop fucking breathing on me.
Stop breathing on me, huh?
Put him in the bathroom.
Sonny, he ain't gonna fit.
I don't give a fuck!
It's a lot of money.
-Hit the board. -Shoot the fucking dice.
We've got a four.
Alright. That's alright.
They're jilted dice.
Give it another shot.
What's wrong with this money? What is he, crazy?
I say the kid makes it in four. Another $500.
-I'll put $200. -$500 more.
-$200. -Twenty two on a hard four.
-OK. -I'm laying $100.
-Who laid $40? -We got no $40 game.
-One $40 game. -Put it down.
-He'll make the hard four. -He'll never do it.
We need the points, you can do it.
-Don't worry, I'll throw a seven. -No!
-Yeah, throw a seven. -Shut up!
-Hey! -You believe this kid?
Hey, nobody laugh at this kid, right?
Sevens are not good now.
-Go on, kid. -Hit the wall.
You've gotta make the point.
No, no, no. Frankie Coffeecake, no good.
I don't want his face putting off the kid. No, no, no.
Jimmy, get a towel. Put it over his head.
Come on, Sonny, it's embarrassing.
Put him in the fucking bathroom.
Wait a minute. Whoa! My money's here.
Get the fuck outta here!
Get him the fuck out of here!
-Place your bets. -What's his problem?
Come on, make this point.
Listen to me. See that money? Are we gonna make this point?
Come on. Atta boy.
-Come on. -You can do it.
-I need a 2/2 or the hot four. -Don't get cocky.
-Just make the point. -Fucking kid.
Just make the point. Go ahead.
-I don't fucking believe it! -He did it!
'Eleven. I made eleven passes in a row.'
'Sonny won a lot of money that night.'
'He said I was at the best school in the world: Belmont Avenue university.'
'And getting one education from the street, and one from school,
I'd be twice as smart as everybody.'
Hey, kid.
You did good.
Thanks.
Here.
That's it?
Here.
Alright?
Go home. It's late.
See you later, Sonny.
Listen.
We've gotta do something about your name.
From now on your name is C.
-C? -That's right. C.
Go home. Go ahead.
So long, Sonny.
Sonny took me everywhere - he called me his boy - and a strange thing happened.'
Hey, Calogero. I wanna talk to you.
My name is C.
I mean C.
How are you today, my boy?
Good.
I've got some peaches for your mom.
I don't have any money, Phil.
You don't need no money with me, kid.
Don't ever embarrass me like that again.
Just tell Sonny that I took care of you.
OK.
'That's when it hit me.'
'Sonny was the reason they were being nice.'
'I liked it.'
'I liked it a lot.'
Mom, look what I got. Some peaches for -
Free.
-What's this? -What's what, Dad?
Where d'you get this? We found this.
I been saving.
$600? What, did you become a brain surgeon?
Tell your father where you got it.
-I worked. -Doing what?
-Things. -Things?
What things?
All things. No things.
Hey, don't lie to me. Tell me the truth and I won't get upset.
-Promise? -I'm your father.
Would I say it if I didn't mean it?
I get tips at the crap games.
-Crap games? -What crap games?
What tips?
-What crap games? -You weren't gonna get upset.
I lied. Tell me everything.
-I worked for Sonny. -I knew it.
Didn't we say don't go near that bar?
But, I worked for it.
What do you mean worked?
I'm taking it back to the bar.
Let's think about this.
What are you saying?
We could use the money. It wasn't from anything bad.
That's not the point.
I don't want him to have that kind of money.
Just listen to me for a minute.
-Let's think about this - -That's it.
-Come on. -Wait a minute. Listen.
Lorenzo, why do you always get like this? Calm down.
Lorenzo. Please!
I don't believe this.
Lorenzo.
Lorenzo, please.
Sonny around?
Yeah. I think he's in the back.
-We can't accept that. -I gave it to your son, not you.
-Yes, I don't want my son involved. -Involved in what?
I'm not a stupid man. Please. I'm not stupid.
Just stay away from my son. OK?
Hey! You stay right over here. C, go outside.
I'll speak to my own son. Calogero, wait outside.
I respect you, Lorenzo, you're a stand-up guy,
but don't ever talk to me like that again.
-I tell your son to go to school - -You don't understand.
It's not what you say, it's what he sees.
It's the clothes, cars, money - everything.
He threw out his baseball cards cos Mickey Mantle doesn't pay my rent.
He said that? I don't believe it.
It's not funny, not when your kid has more money than you.
I offered you a job but you said no to me.
And I say no now. Just leave my son alone.
Hey!
I treat that kid like he's my son.
He ain't your son.
-He's what? -He's my son.
Get the fuck out.
-I'm not afraid of you. -You should be.
I know what you can do, I'd never step out of line,
but this time you're wrong.
You don't fool with a man's family.
You gonna fight me?
-You stay away - -Get out!
-Just stay away. -Go ahead!
-Stay away! -Get the fuck out!
-Where's my money, Dad? -I left it in there.
What! It was my money!
It's bad money.
Dad, I earned it -
I said, stay away from him.
Dad, listen -
I said, you stay away!
Dad, listen to me!
Did you hear me? Stay away!
Sonny was right. The working man is a sucker.
He's wrong.
It's easy to pull a trigger, but try and work for a living.
Let him try that, we'll see who's tough.
The working man's the tough guy. I'm the tough guy.
People love him. Do people love you? It's the same.
It's not the same.
People don't love him, they fear him. There's a difference.
I don't understand, Daddy.
You will. You will when you get older.
I'm sorry I hit you.
D'you want me to take care of him?
No, leave him alone.
'Sonny and my father never spoke again.'
'And I never listened to my father's advice.'
'The bond was too close, I'd see him any chance I got.'
'Eight years passed, and as I grew, Sonny grew in power.'
'He became a boss, and I was his friend.'
# It's a beautiful morning
# And I think I'll go outside the wire
'It was now 1968, and Dione was on top of the charts.'
'The Beatles were big.'
'The Yankees were last and I didn't give a shit.'
'There was change everywhere, except in my neighbourhood.'
"And they're off! And Kryptonite is leading."
Good, here comes the kid.
C, come here.
-You got it? -Yeah.
-It's all on Kryptonite. -Beauty!
-What you got? -Beautiful.
Look at this horse go. Take it home! Look at him move!
-He can't lose. -You can do it, Kryptonite!
Look, it's beautiful. Don't even worry about it.
I don't even need to look cos we can't loose.
Look, he's pulling away.
-Come on, Kryptonite! -Come on, Kryptonite!
Look at him, it's all over.
-It's all over. -Let's go.
-It's a sure thing. -That's it 59.
Come on! Come on, Kryptonite! Come on!
Come on, Kryptonite! Hang in there, Kryptonite!
-Oh, shit! -Come on!
He backed the fucking horse?
He backed Kryptonite?
Give me the tickets.
But, Sonny, we're winning.
We can't win, the Mush backed Kryptonite. Jinx!
We're in the lead.
We've been mushed.
Come on, Kryptonite! Hang in there!
Hang in there!
You fucking Judas.
You can still do this.
Come on, Kryptonite!
-Come on, Kryptonite! -Come on!
Hang in there!
Come on, take it home!
Hang in there! Hang in there!
No! No!
No! Shit!
This fucking close, and we fucking lost.
-We fucking lost. -Sonofabitch!
I don't believe it!
C, I've got a tip in the next race for you.
Well, fuck yourself!
Oh, you get very emotional.
"Wide Berth wins it in an absolute shocker".
# If you want...
# Something to play with
# Go and find yourself a car... #
'We finally got our own social club, called the Deuces Wild.'
'Drinks were a buck, and the juke box paid the rent.'
'All we did was hang out.'
'We'd cut class and hang out.'
'Nobody wanted to leave, cos God forbid you went home
and found out the next day that you'd missed something.'
Whoa! Whoa! Fellas. Whoa! Look at those broads.
-They're beautiful. -Come over here, darling.
Amore mio vieni qua, vieni.
Vieni qua, dammi un bacio.
-Come on, sit down. -Va funculo!
-Those broads are pigs. -How d'you know?
Fuck you, C.
How do you know?
They fail my test.
-What test? -It has a name?
To see if a girl is worth marrying, she's gotta pass the test.
I call it the Mario test.
This I gotta hear.
You take a girl for a ride in your car, right?
Yeah.
Jump on the highway,
and pull up to one of those big fucking 18 wheel trucks.
Pull up beside it and get the driver's attention.
Honk your horn, whatever, just make sure he's watching.
At the same time and you start pushing her head down firmly between your legs.
-Get the fuck outta here. -Yeah.
It's for her own good.
Now, if this girl goes down on the old bragiola,
knowing that guy is watching,
then she can't be trusted.
-It won't work. -You're sick, you need help.
And if throw their hair over their ears, they did it before.
Believe me, they're pros.
Those niggers have passed us twice today.
Who gives a fuck?
What are you talking about? I give a fuck.
Did they bother you? No.
But next week it's two cars, then before you know it -
They're fucking our broads.
They shouldn't come through.
Let's invite them in - give them a shot.
Baseball bat their heads.
Louie! Get over here. Where's my money?
I gotta go, you know?
-Shit! -What's up?
This guy owes me 20 bucks.
You can't dodge me forever!
Fucking piece of shit.
Fellas, I'll be right back.
-Alright. -Alright.
-I'll see you. -Come back.
Take a ride with me.
-Do I have to? -Yeah, you have to.
Sit over here.
Dad, do we have to listen to this? It gives me a headache.
You kids today don't know what good music is.
This is good music.
MUSIC: THE COMPLEXIONS: I Only Have Eyes For You
Wanna go to the fight tomorrow?
Calogero?
Hey, are you listening? Calogero?
Dad, why can't you call me C?
Cos that's the name that I gave you.
That's why I can't call you C.
Do you wanna go to the fight or not?
Can I let you know tomorrow?
I wanna know now, so come on, do you wanna go?
Alright, I'll go.
Don't say it like that. I don't wanna twist your arm.
WILSON PICKETT: Ninety Nine and a Half (Won't Do)
She was tall, she was beautiful, and she was classy,
but she was black...
and was a no-no in my neighbourhood.
Jackie, what's the first?
Two o'clock, fellas.
Two. Your friends number.
-Who? -Your pal.
Don't fuck around.
-Bush scored 228? -That's it.
-Again? -Again.
I'll try to have some better music next time.
I'm only kidding. It's OK, Pop.
See you later.
Louie!
My grandmother's sick.
I'll talk to you later, I gotta go do something.
Where's my fucking money?
You're fucking dead when I catch you, you piece of shit.
-C! Come here! -What's wrong?
-Get over here. -He's crazy.
Hey, the kid wants his fucking money, so what you gonna do?
I'm gonna talk to him.
Stop babying him.
He owes me money.
-Hit him with a fucking bat. -Wack him.
What kind of advice is that?
-Fucking hoodlums. -Stop babying him.
-Come on, lets' go in. -Don't listen to these hoodlums.
I'll be right back.
Alright.
What's the matter?
Louie Dumps owes me $20.
It's been two weeks now and he keeps dodging me.
-Yeah? -Should I crack him one, or what?
What's the matter? What have I said?
Sometimes hurting somebody ain't the answer.
Is he a good friend?
Nah, I don't even like him.
Don't even like him. Well, there's your answer.
Look, it cost you $20 to get rid of him.
He'll never bother you, or ask you for money again.
He's out of your life for $20. You got off cheap, forget it.
You're always right.
Yeah, I'm always right.
If I was always right I wouldn't have done ten years in the joint.
What did you do every day?
There's only three things you can do.
Lift weights, play cards, or get into trouble.
What did you do?
Me? I read.
What did you read?
-Ever hear of Machiavelli? -Who?
Machiavelli. He's a famous writer from 500 years ago.
Availability, he always said.
-Availability? -That's right.
Listen to me.
Do you know why I live here?
Availability.
I want to stay close to everything.
Being here, I can see trouble immediately.
Trouble is like a cancer.
You have to get it early, before it kills you.
You have to cut it out.
Capisci? Huh? Come on.
You're worried about Louie Dumps. Nobody cares. Nobody cares.
Worry about yourself, your family, and your friends.
It comes down to availability.
The people who see me every day, that are on my side,
they feel safe cos I'm close, and they have more reason to love me.
But those who want to do otherwise think twice,
cos they know I'm close, and they have more reason to fear me.
Is it better to be loved or feared?
It's a good question.
It's nice to be both, but it's difficult.
If I had my choice, I would rather be feared.
Fear lasts longer than love.
Friendships bought with money mean nothing.
If I make a joke, everybody laughes. I'm funny, but not that funny.
Fear keeps them loyal, but the trick is not to be hated.
I treat them good, but not too good.
I give them enough to need me, but they don't hate me.
Don't forget this.
Sonny, I've got some beautiful veal today,
and some nice linguini.
Those not dressed properly must leave.
-Properly? -What's wrong?
-What's up? -I asked these men to leave.
Is there a problem here?
Problem is your man there says we're not properly dressed.
-We just want a few beers. -That's it?
Then we'll leave.
We ain't looking for trouble.
Go on, give them their beers.
-I appreciate it. -No problem.
You got some booze here?
Line em up, come on.
-Two over here, huh? -Can I have one here?
One more, one more beer.
Alright, Buzz, if I may - a toast to our hosts.
In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost!
Look at all this beer all over me!